


at least we're falling as one

by aizensosuke



Series: the dreamers and the lovers [12]
Category: Bleach
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Deception, Developing Relationship, Established Relationship, Explicit Sexual Content, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Kitsune, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Mind Games, Multi, Pack Dynamics, Threesome - M/M/M, Unrequited Love, villain origin story
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-01
Updated: 2019-03-07
Packaged: 2019-11-07 14:36:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17962436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aizensosuke/pseuds/aizensosuke
Summary: when aizen sosuke attacked kuchiki byakuya beneath the guise of a challenge for the position of pack alpha, it left no doubt in the minds of their pack: aizen sosuke was a traitor and a monster, someone not to be trusted. someone not to chase after as he entered official exile, taking loyal friends ichimaru gin and tousen kaname with him. aizen sosuke was the mild-mannered alpha who made fools of all of them, destroying their trust in the process.except aizen sosuke is not an alpha and never wanted to lead the pack in the first place.





	1. Chapter 1

The night is a quiet one. With his head tipped toward the moonlight gleaming down upon this area of the forest, his eyes closed and his expression serene, Aizen Sosuke is every bit the proud and beautiful pack alpha that he is known for being. Every muscle is relaxed this evening, the furrowed lines of his brow smooth and the corners of his lips tipped up in a small smile as he enjoys the quiet and the warm spring air. His heat will not come for another week, so enjoying the night while he can is imperative to him.

From his place in the tree above, Ichimaru Gin watches over his mate with a fond eye, his tails wrapped around him to keep him safe from the roughness of the bark behind him and below him. He likes high places— _the feline part of you,_ Tousen often teases him— and he likes them best when he can watch Sosuke from them, see a side of him that no one else is entitled to. After all, no one else could ever stand above his Sosuke.

In the distance, Gin can hear the alphas of the pack hunting together, and if he tips his ears hard enough, he can pick up the twin footfalls of Nnoitra Gilga and Tesla Lindocruz as they hunt on their own terms. _Some things never change,_ he thinks fondly. Even when confronted with pain and anguish and suffering on a level they have prepared for but always seem to stumble when confronted with, the pack always picks itself back up and resumes its old habits as if a challenge to the universe at large to take them back down. Gin is glad such a call has never been heeded. They have lost no one thus far.

He likes the night as well as the wolves do, as well as their two kittens. The darkness suits him, the moonlight bathing him so that he glows at just the right angle, a myth made reality and cloaked in fantasy. He wonders if he had looked quite so impressive the first time Sosuke met him when they were both children, neither of them innocent, neither of them bearing the weight of childish naivete any longer.

No, they had not been granted such a privilege in the earlier years of their lives.

He drops down from his spot in the tree, landing smoothly on his hands and feet in a crouch, tails flicking out behind him to shake stray pieces of bark out of his fur. The soft sound has Sosuke’s head turning toward him even before his eyes open, and the angelic smile he is granted for coming to join his mate overjoys him. It fills him to the core with happiness and he bounds forward, pouncing Sosuke to the grass so he can nuzzle him.

“My love,” Sosuke greets him, and Gin yips softly in greeting as he nipples Sosuke’s throat gently. “Ah, ah, that’s for Kaname, remember? Keep your teeth to yourself until then.”

“Just a taste,” Gin says, sucking the skin until it grows warm and rosy beneath his tongue.

“I’ll indulge you just this once.” Fingers sift through his hair, a thumb stroking the edge of his ear and earning a shiver from him. “I should have known you were just above me. And here I was wondering which tree you had picked for your nightly perch.”

Gin smiles softly against his skin. “Don’t I always pick the one just above you, my darling?”

“Of course you do. Always watching over me.” Sosuke catches him by the chin and draws his face upwards for a smooth kiss that steals into the warmest part of Gin’s body.

“Didn’t I promise you?” he asks, and Sosuke’s face softens in consideration as he nods, stroking along the back of Gin’s ear gently. “Told you then I’d always be by your side. And yet you still looked surprised when I agreed to do all of this with you.”

This time, Sosuke’s eyes flit away from his, studying the sky over his shoulder perhaps? “Yes, well, Kira. I had reason to believe you had come to enjoy our lives then.”

“Izuru is fine without me, I’m certain. You’re more important anyway.” And he always would be. There was no one was important to Gin as Sosuke was.

Soft footsteps catch his attention and he amends that statement. There _was_ one other.

“Sorry to keep you waiting, Sosuke.” Tousen Kaname’s voice is smooth and warm naturally, a delightful sound that has Gin’s tails wagging aggressively behind him as their partner comes to join them for the evening instead of running with the alphas. “I was reviewing Szayel’s latest report on the north. It seems they aren’t happy, but they will deal with it.”

Soft laughter leaves Sosuke’s throat as he stretches a hand out and Gin mirrors the gesture, fingers grasping at empty hair. “As careful as always, Kaname.”

“I promised you that I would do my best for you.” Slowly, Tousen kneels on the grass, taking each of their hands, completing the circuit, breathing life into them.

Even without the use of his eyes, Tousen has always been able to find them; a wolf’s sight is less visual and more scent-based anyway, and they had learned this area well over the time they lived here. Gin half-clambers off of Sosuke so he can greet the alpha, kissing the palm of Tousen’s hand before leaning in to kiss him on the cheek. Always a touch more careful with him than he is with Sosuke, always testing the waters because a part of Gin will always be prepared for the moment when he is pushed away. Used to it, even, given his heritage, who and what he is. What he will always be and has always been.

“Gin.” Tousen turns his head, and his kisses are just as soft and just as sweet.

“Kaname,” Gin purrs in answer, snuggling in against his side, wrapping two of his tails around Tousen’s waist to keep him as close as he can given the difficult position.

Sosuke watches them with a fond smile on his lips. “May I join you two?”

Tousen settles with his back to Gin’s former perch and holds his arms out to them, and they each end up on half of his lap, perched on his powerful thighs. Sosuke sighs softly, tucks his head up under Tousen’s chin and closes his eyes, and Gin marvels as he stares at the two of them together. The contrast between the two of them is so beautiful.

Living with wolf packs taught Gin what it meant to be an alpha, what it meant to be an omega, and how he fit into nothing and everything all at once in a way that only ever confused him and, at the very least, endeared him to Kira and exasperated everyone else. They thought him odd and strange; he could fake it with Kira, who was shy and lacked the necessary experience to realize that something was wrong with Gin, something at the core of his being that made him different. But with these two, he has some respite.

Tousen is not the protective and aggressive alpha Gin knows he should be, just as Sosuke is not the submissive and nurturing omega so many expect him to be. It is Sosuke with the sharp and dangerous nature, the one who had laid their plan out and put it into practice by ruthlessly ripping into their former pack alpha to leave no trail behind them when they walked away from everything for good. It is Tousen who held them both on those long, cold, dark nights when the plan was yet to be put into motion, who wiped away Gin’s tears and reassured him that he was good enough as he was, good enough for both of them.

Sometimes, Gin doubts this to be true. But he knows as well as anyone else there is nothing he can do about it other than believe it. After all, here the three of them are.

Sosuke’s peachy soft skin is a beautiful contrast to Tousen’s warm mahogany skin, Sosuke’s tousled curls so tempting to play with while Gin wraps Tousen’s tight cornrows around his fingers late at night when the man is asleep. Tousen’s eyes, unseeing though they are, are pale in color while Sosuke’s are dark and deep, the bottom of a well Gin would fall within while trying to gaze into the depths. He is confident Tousen would catch him, though.

“I can hear your thoughts, kitsune.” Tousen speaks the word with no wonder or vitriol but a warm fondness that makes Gin’s chest expand as he snuggles into the man’s chest, yipping softly when Tousen slips an arm around his back to rest on his hip, holding him as much as he can, as close as he can. “Rest or share your woes so we can comfort you.”

Gin huffs against the side of his neck. “You’re certain I have woes to share, ne?”

“You always do,” Sosuke tells him, and Gin’s ear twitches in irritation at how true he knows the words to be, how often he has bled to them when the doubts are too much.

“I don’t tonight. I was just thinking of how beautiful the two of you are.” _And how lucky I am to have both of you in my life when just having one of you seems so impossible._

Tousen hums softly. “You’re beautiful too, little fox. Every part of you is so delicate and fragile and yet you persevere in a way no one else quite can. And you have a lovely smile.”

The compliment has Gin all kinds of flustered; Tousen can see with his hands, and those hands have been all over Gin’s body, under his clothing and mapping out the entirety of his body, every sensitive place and scar. “Hush, Kaname. I’m not feeling inferior tonight.”

“And maybe if I say it enough, you’ll never feel inferior again.” Tousen kisses the top of his head and Gin whines, curling small against him, trying to hide from the embarrassment.

“Did you ever think you would be here?” Sosuke asks him, and Gin blinks up at him, not sure what Sosuke means until he elaborates in a softer voice. “The mate of a pack alpha, the second of a pack dedicated to erasing the menace we’ve dealt with for so long.”

Gin flashes him a smile, all teeth. “I never thought I’d get to be _your_ mate, so I’m still trying to process that much. You gonna let us mark you for real soon?”

“My next heat, I think,” Sosuke murmurs. “Kaname? Unless you wanted to wait longer?”

“Your next heat it is. I’ll look forward to the rest of the pack finally quieting with their whispers of where your mark must be. Though they’ll be shocked when they finally see it and realize you weren’t marked to begin with.” Tousen chuckles softly and rests his cheek on top of Sosuke’s head, and the two of them always take Gin’s breath away.

“And me?” he asks, unable to help how restless he feels. “I’ll get to mark you, too?”

Sosuke stretches out a hand, strokes it down the side of his face. “You will. I imagine it’ll take. Omegas take mating marks very well. I’ll have one on each side. Are you going to let Kaname try to mark you? I’m sure it would take if it was what you truly wanted.”

“I mean…” Gin touches the side of his own throat and imagines bearing a mark as proudly as most of their pack does. “I mean, I’d like to try maybe. If you’re both fine with it.”

“Hisagi bore my mark at one time. I would feel no shame if you were to do the same.” Tousen’s hand skips up to his neck and Gin shivers at the sensation of those fingers on his skin, calluses teasing over the sensitive flesh. “You functionally serve as our beta when Sosuke is in heat. In a sense, it would be similar, I believe. If you would want that.”

“I like it,” Gin confesses, hugging a knee to his chest, always shy, always feeling like saying this out loud is stepping where he does not deserve to step. He isn’t one of them, after all.

Sosuke chuckles softly and his fingers join Tousen’s on Gin’s neck, leaving him a bit too warm, a bit overwhelmed at this attention. “Good. Then we’ll halfway match.”

It comforts him to remember that the only traditional trio in their entire pack are Apacci, Mila Rose, and Sung-Sun, that everyone else is an anomaly and that as time passes, the lines grow ever the more crossed. Grimmjow is an omega with two alphas and though Ggio is a beta with two alphas, he acts less and less like a beta as the days pass by and hunts with the alphas without hesitation. No one in their pack had ever fit any kind of role that such pack structure dictated, so it was fine if Gin himself stood as another outlier.

In a way, it was just fitting into not fit in at all for the lot of them.

“You think too much and too loud,” Tousen tells him, and when Gin attempts to protest this, Tousen kisses him to silence him, drowning out any arguments he could have made.

There was one aspect of Tousen that reminded Gin he was an alpha, and it was the passion and intensity of his affection when he sought to distract one of them from their own private suffered. He kisses like a man possessed, lips moving against Gin’s so fluidly and strongly that Gin has to work to respond to him and he barely catches up when Tousen’s tongue strokes into his mouth, igniting a heat in his belly. And he doesn’t notice until it’s too late, Tousen’s fingers slipping into his tails at the very bases, rubbing the spaces of skin there that are so sensitive to touch that Gin is keening against his lips.

“Much better,” Tousen murmurs when Gin is panting and flushed, struggling to keep his thoughts in order. “You should just let us love you instead of questioning everything.”

Gin scoffs softly and cuddles closer to him. “Well, you make it easy to not asking so many questions when you get like that. You gonna last to Sosuke’s heat?”

“I could just take you now in the grass,” Tousen murmurs, and Gin’s stomach clenches hard at the thought of pillowing himself on his tails, Tousen keeping him warm on top. “I think you want that. I can just smell how aroused you grew at the thought of it.”

“What can I say? You know the way to my heart is through my dick.” Gin can’t help the snark. It serves as a good shield for his soft gooey feelings underneath.

Sosuke laughs. “You’re so crude. Come here and give me a kiss. I feel so left out.”

Truth be told, Gin could kiss Sosuke for ages. The first time they had been teenagers, barely on the cusp of being so for that matter, and Sosuke asked Gin if he would mind trying given the fact that the two of them had always been close. It was before Byakuya’s pack, when things were simpler, when life made more sense and Sosuke’s inexperienced and uncertain kisses made the stars shine brighter for days after.

They both know how to kiss now. The stars have been bright since the moment they left.

Gin cups Sosuke’s cheek and kisses him, their lips finding a familiar rhythm as they lean closer to one another. Sosuke’s nose brushes gently against the side of his and their tongues twine together in the middle, a slick wet dance that leaves Gin breathless every time. It feels as though Gin is so plain and simple, as though Sosuke is the fantastical creature from beyond the realm of human understanding brought to life and living color.

“I love you.” Sosuke kisses the words into his mouth, forces Gin to taste the sweetness of his devotion. “I will always love you. I want you to be my mate in more than name alone.”

“And I want that. So bad. You can’t even imagine.” Gin whispers the words back, moans when Sosuke sucks them off of his tongue and pulls Gin in for more.

Scents are important to wolves; Gin can smell Sosuke’s scent intensify the longer they kiss, edged with arousal, that sweet lily scent he’s come to love so much. And just beneath it is the richer coffee bean scent Tousen carries like a second skin, fanning over both of them, leaving Gin dizzy with how much he wants both of them. Out here in the open? Why not? It wouldn’t be the first time they’ve had sex with each other where the pack could see. Back when they lived outdoors and inside of Gin’s careful barriers, it was all they had.

“You’re wearing so little.” Tousen’s hand creeps inside of his yukata and Gin yelps, squirming when curious fingers brush over one of his nipples. “Let me take you, Gin.”

“ _Please._ ” It’s half-hissed through his teeth and Tousen laughs softly in his ear.

Who cares if the rest of the pack sees them? Gin has no qualms about being nude.

Tousen lies him on his back, careful of his tails, and unties the sash at Gin’s waist; beneath the yukata there is nothing, a testament to just how wicked he decided to be this evening. When Tousen’s hand skims down his bare side, Gin shivers all over and spreads his legs side automatically, hooking his ankles in the small of Tousen’s back to pull him closer, rutting up against him insistently. Letting Tousen feel the hot, hard press of his erect cock.

“You should have just asked if you were this desperate, little fox.” Tousen kisses the side of his neck, his braids falling gently onto Gin’s chest, dragging over his sensitive skin as Tousen’s kisses trail down to his shoulder. “I can smell just how needy you are.”

“What do I smell like?” Gin asks him, unbearably curious even as he tries to rut up and convince Tousen to skip the foreplay and just touch his cock.

“Like the night.” Tousen grips his hip to keep him still, tongue tracing a delicate circle around the hollow of his throat before dipping inside, a chuckle warm against his skin as Gin arches his neck in offering to the alpha above him. “Like moonlight.”

 _That doesn’t seem real,_ Gin thinks, and then Tousen nips at his collarbone, palms a nipple.

“Sosuke?” Tousen calls. “Do you want to join us, or do you only want to watch for now?”

Stretching out next to them on the grass, Sosuke pillows his head on one arm. “Just watch for now. You can service me after. I want to watch you when you fuck him.”

The words are a dark promise and Tousen’s lips are back on Gin’s skin once more, Gin’s eyes drifting shut as he gives into the sensation and the pleasure of letting this man touch him as he pleases. Tousen has never hurt him and pays reverent respect to his body, leaving no part of him untouched, leaving no scar unkissed. Some of them are small and almost unnoticeable against Gin’s moon white skin but there are nasty ones, a twisting path down his ribcage from a hunter’s blade, angled wrong and glancing off of his ribs.

If the bastard had been smart enough, he could have gutted Gin from the side.

Tousen runs the flat of his tongue up the scar and Gin shivers, remembers how gently Tousen held him while Sosuke soothed the wound and bandaged it. “I’ll take you on your back so that all of you is bared to the moonlight. I’d never dream of hiding you.”

“Like that,” Gin murmurs, eyelids already heavy. “I like having my tails under me. Comfy.”

“You’re cute.” Tousen kisses him before he can argue, sliding his hands up Gin’s bare thighs.

Unlike Gin, who was prepared for this very moment, Tousen is wearing _actual_ clothing, so Gin has to pull his shirt up over his head, careful not to catch his braids and yank them in the process. They spill all around his shoulders and chest and back and Gin swoons just a little inside at the sight, running his fingers down the side of Tousen’s face to coax him closer for another kiss. This time, Tousen skips right down to his chest, catches a nipple between his lips and sucks it until Gin whines and writhes softly up against him.

“You taste divine.” Tousen drags the flat of his tongue over Gin’s nipple, sucking it once it hardens in the cool night air, drawing a whine from Gin’s lips. “Absolute perfection.”

Gin wraps his fingers in Tousen’s cornrows, tries to gently tug his head down even though his feeble grip does all of nothing. “Please,” he intones, and Tousen laughs softly.

He accomplishes his goal just the same though, Tousen mouthing at his belly, teasing the soft and vulnerable skin there with his teeth before pressing soothing kisses to it. His mouth is hot and wet as it wraps around Gin’s cock, hand sliding up under Gin’s thigh to hold him spread wide open and vulnerable. Because it’s Tousen, Gin doesn’t mind being a little vulnerable, head falling back in a soft moan, tails twitching restlessly beneath him.

“My pretty fox.” Sosuke creeps closer to him, fingertips tracing a pattern along Gin’s collarbone that has him shivering all over. “How does his mouth feel on you?”

“Perfect.” Gin reaches for Sosuke, the omega leaning over to kiss him properly.

The pitiful whine that leaves his lips when Tousen’s mouth slides off of him is petulant even to his ears— And then soft lips press reverent kisses to the inside of his thigh just before a wet tongue swipes at his hole. Gin’s entire body jolts and he breathes hot and hard, body arching, hips lifting off of his own tails in open offering. Tousen knows how much he enjoys this and riles him up with it, toying with him, licking around and over his hole but not inside of it, not yet. Just teasing him, playing with him.

“You turn so pink when you blush.” Sosuke strokes a hand down the side of his neck and all Gin can do is wheeze weakly. “Especially under the moonlight like this.”

Gin nips at his lips and Sosuke laughs, fingers gripping Gin’s chin, forcing his mouth open so that Sosuke can lick into it, twine it with his own. It perfectly matches the moment when Tousen stops teasing him, pressing his tongue inside. Gin writhes between them, caught.

“All ours,” Sosuke whispers against his lips. “Open up pretty for him. I want to watch you.”

“Hnngh, I didn’t bring any lube with me,” Gin admits, and Sosuke laughs and licks a wet trail along his neck, sucking on his pulse, rasping his teeth over the delicate flesh.

When his head dips back up, his eyes are nearly black, pupils dilated so wide in the dark, from the pleasure. “I’ll have to use my mouth on him, then, won’t I?”

“You can sit on my face if you do,” Gin promises, and he sees the flush in Sosuke’s face, the pleasure there. “Be too spent to do shit after he’s done with me but I can do that.”

“You have a deal.” Sosuke kisses him again, sucks his tongue and Gin squirms against him.

Tousen’s tongue dips inside of him and back out, fucking him open on a slick slide that has Gin writhing and gasping, pulling his knees up against his own chest. He’s already trembling when Tousen slides a finger inside of him, and then another. Pressing them up up _up_ until Gin shakes and whines and keens softly, desperate sounds, his ears flattening on top of his head. Tousen never stops, never slows. He opens Gin up with the patience of someone who has done this so many times before, knows how to touch him and where, the amount of pressure he can take. Three fingers has him shaking almost violently.

“Excuse me, Kaname.” Sosuke slips down next to him. “Keep your fingers inside of him but let me lower. If we don’t have lube then my mouth is going to have to do.”

“We’ll reward you for the assistance,” Tousen says, and Gin makes a blissful sound in agreement as he rocks down on Tousen’s fingers, loving how full he feels.

He can’t see so well at this angle but he recognizes the wet slick sounds of Sosuke’s mouth on Tousen’s cock and thinks that it would hurt so much more if he wasn’t used to this, if he hadn’t taken Tousen’s cock so many times before. As it is, he relishes the way Tousen groans, letting his head fall back as one hand drifts down to where Sosuke’s hair must be, encouraging him to stay close. It’s almost sensual enough for Gin to forget the matter at hand. Almost, until Sosuke leans back and Tousen slips between his thighs once more.

Alphas are usually well-endowed, and Tousen is no different. The blunt head of his cock stretches Gin’s rim impossibly before sliding in and then he’s wonderfully full, his head falling back on a weak and pitiful moan as his inner walls wrap tight around Tousen, pulling him deeper and rubbing up against him. His body is more desperate and needy than he believed possible but his lovers always find a way to teach him something new.

“You’re so wonderfully tight.” Tousen nips at his shoulder and Gin shivers, spreads his legs wider so that Tousen can bottom out inside of him, choking at how stretched he is, how full. “So hot, Gin. Does it feel good for you? You’re so quiet.”

“F-full.” Gin reaches for him and Tousen presses down against him, letting Gin cling to him, rolling his hips to grind up into him until Gin cries out. “Fuck me!”

Tousen stops to kiss him until Gin is on the verge of tears from want. “I would be glad to.”

Every movement of his body is hypnotic, the slow rolls of his hips drawing him out of Gin in only snatches of centimeters before he sheathes himself inside once more. It would hurt so much if Gin wasn’t used to him, if Gin wasn’t so desperate for him that his body obeys, the most meager use of his magic opening him up just enough to make it pleasurable for both of them. It’s still a tight fit even with all of that factor in and he’s gasping against Tousen’s shoulder, rocking his hips to meet each fluid thrust.

“You are perfect,” Tousen tells him, and like this, Gin could believe him. He could fall for it totally and never question it. “Every part of you is flawless.”

Gin squeezes his eyes shut against the affection, shuddering at how it feels to have Tousen so close to him, pressed so tight against his front that it grinds his cock between their stomachs and Tousen’s is hard, his abs a perfect texture to rut up against. “Thank you. Thank you thank you thank—” He chokes himself off on a desperate moan.

“Don’t thank me for telling you the truth. Thank me for fucking you like this.” And then Tousen pins his hands above his head and fucks into him like he means it.

The stars over his shoulders flare brighter with the force of it and Gin howls, head thrown back, legs spread wantonly wide and body heaving with his breaths. Tousen is better than any man he’s ever had, his rhythm perfected, his angle dragging his shaft against Gin’s prostate in such a way that he’s trembling from the pressure and the stimulation long before the hot curl of heat blooms in his gut and traces its way along his limbs.

Embarrassing, how Tousen doesn’t have to touch him to make him come. He just kisses Gin and fucks him and whispers to him how pretty he is, how pleasing, how good he feels and how lovely the noises he makes are, and Gin is gone. He’s seizing up around Tousen so sudden and sharp and tight, his eyes rolling back in his head, making a mess of them both with his release. When Tousen groans and comes inside of him, he shivers all over, the splash of wet heat inside of him fulfilling in a way that’s almost too much to handle.

When Tousen carefully slides out of him, Gin feels wrung out and exhausted, huffs laughter when Sosuke kisses the side of his neck. “‘M so sensitive. Thank you, Kaname.”

“I love to take care of you.” Tousen pets down the inside of his thigh, brushes his fingers over where the muscles are still jumping, small little reactionary twitches. “I wish I could have been there from the very beginning to take care of both of you.”

Sosuke sighs against Gin’s throat. “Ah, the very beginning. I remember those days. Back when it was just the two of us and my mother. Do you remember those days, Gin?”

“How could I ever forget?” Gin turns, kisses Sosuke on the tip of his nose. “We saved each other then and it created a bond between us that nothing else could ever match.”

Tousen smiles softly, and Gin has to credit the man for being stronger than he is because he looks at the bond Tousen has with Sosuke and fears while Tousen looks at _their_ bond and only seems to love them deeper. “Not to interrupt, but we owe Sosuke.”

“We do,” Gin agrees, and then opens his arms. “Come here, my beautiful omega.”

With sure hands, Tousen guides Sosuke to kneel over his face, whispering something in his ear that has him giggling as his fingers slide into Gin’s hair and urge his mouth closer.

_Ah, the beginning._


	2. Chapter 2

_ The scent of blood and silver are like a blanket in the air, wearing you down even as you stay as low to the ground as possible on small, timid feet. Do you remember, Sosuke? _

“The wounds Tesla sustained while he was with them for one day are interesting,” Szayel says, his reports laid out in front of him. Sosuke perches on the edge of his desk, eyeing the leaflets curiously. “I catalogued each one when I realized they seemed irregular.”

“Irregular. What were the hunters doing to him?” Sosuke asks. Letting the matter rest was not possible for him; the strange scent of blood in their territory begged him to investigate each strange occurrence until he found a thread of commonality in them.

Szayel looks happier and healthier than he has in a long time, and when he tilts his head just so, Sosuke can see a press of teeth on his throat, just visible against his fair skin. “The bullet wound was expected. But the bullet was removed from the wound. If it had been present in his bloodstream for as long as it took us to find him, it should have killed him. That caught my eye right away. Why would they bother doing such a thing?”

“I can’t imagine.” Sosuke stretches out a hand, pinching the collar of Szayel’s shirt between his finger and thumb, moving the fabric away from Szayel’s throat. “You have a mating mark on your throat. Where did this come from? Which of the alphas?”

He sees a skitter of uncertainty and fear in Szayel’s eyes. “Aaroniero’s.”

“Congratulations. I’m happy to see the pack settling down nicely.” Sosuke covers the mark back up for him and folds his hands in his lap. “So, tell me what else you noticed.”

“It was hard to make sense of it at first and Tesla was so erratic when we brought him back because of Nnoitra’s injury that asking him questions was impossible. He had to be restrained just so I could work on him.” Szayel’s nose wrinkles and Sosuke smiles softly; he still remembers how Tesla refused to leave Nnoitra’s side, always close to him, waiting for him to wake up. It was why he charged Tesla specifically with watching over Nnoitra.

He has an eye for mated pairs in progress. He wonders how Szayel slipped his notice.

After shuffling the papers in front of him around, Szayel finds what he has been looking for, turning his report around where Sosuke can read it comfortably. “I found needle marks along his veins. Nearly healed, but not quite. He had received injections.”

“Did you test his blood and find anything odd or interesting in it?” Sosuke asks.

“I did.” Szayel turns a few pages on the report and then picks it up, offering it to Sosuke with one hand. “Traces of a chemical I’ve never seen before. It wouldn’t have come from the bullet. I think it’s what they used to dilute the silver in his bloodstream.”

“How quaint that our enemies have managed to answer the question we have yet to.” Sosuke takes the report and reads carefully, glad that Szayel has learned to explain himself as well as he can instead of relying only on scientific and medical terminology.

While it sounds professional, none of the rest of them can understand a word of it.

“That’s not all, though. There was something I noticed that really caught my attention, and it was so close to being healed. Tesla says he doesn’t remember it, but.” Szayel turns the next page of the report. “He had a bite mark on his shoulder. Not a deep one, but a bite mark just the same. And it appears to match a human mouth except for one thing.”

Sosuke scans the report on the bite mark, hovering over the words before frowning. “Sharp teeth and a mouth too wide to be human. Then what the hell would it be?”

“Did Gin notice anything strange when he attacked on his own?” Szayel prompts him.

The question makes the hairs on the back of Sosuke’s neck stand up and he sets the report down, staring at his hands. Yes, Gin gave him an eyewitness report of what happened when they rescued Tesla considering when they stumbled back into the den, Nnoitra was nearly dead, Tesla was hysterical, and all of the alphas were so on edge that a fight seemed imminent just because of that alone. Tesla’s weakened state and concern for Nnoitra kept him from properly snapping at anyone, but Yylfordt and Nelliel had almost come to blows.

_ There was this real tiny man, Sosuke, _ Gin told him.  _ And when I got real close to him and tried to take a swipe at him, all I could smell was blood. He ain’t human. _

“The small man who was able to smell all of you in the darkness smelled of blood. That is what Gin told me.” He had also been told the tall blond human served as the smaller man’s bodyguard, had nearly shot Gin in an effort to keep the smaller man safe from harm.

That makes a fair amount of sense if they’re using him as some sort of weapon or if they value his scenting ability, but it leaves Sosuke wondering what kind of hunting group this must be to keep something so obviously non-human protected within their ranks.

“That’s what I thought you would say. I was hoping for it, even. Nnoitra smelled Tesla’s blood on him, and this confirms my thought. I think he bit Tesla, but I don’t think he liked the taste very much.” Szayel slides open a drawer and pulls out an envelope, fingers dancing carefully along the flap. “I want to warn you, Aizen-sama, that his image is not very pretty, and I apologize for that. But it is a true photograph. Yylfordt took it himself.”

Sosuke holds out his hand and Szayel opens the envelope, sliding out a photograph and setting it in his hand. As soon as he looks down, he drops it in shock.

“I know.” Szayel picks up the photo and hands it to him again, and this time Sosuke forces himself to examine it more closely. “That is what is known as a ghoul. I know you might not want to believe that they exist, but think of Gin. He shouldn’t exist, either.”

The photograph displays a woman with long tangles of dark hair, her eyes lit up in the glow of the camera, her smile gruesomely wide. Her mouth is full of sharp teeth, her lips seeming to stretch far too wide for a human’s smile. If she opened her mouth all the way, Sosuke can imagine her jaw unhinging and sets the photo aside, not wanting to think about it.  _ Is this what that creature is? Is that why Gin was unable to defeat him? _

“This is the woman who killed our parents.” Szayel slides the photograph back into his envelope and Sosuke supposes he must keep it to remind himself that the past is the past, and the two of them are here now, for better or for worse. “Well,  _ woman _ may be stretching the meaning of that word. Ghouls are creatures that feast on flesh.”

“Carnivorous. That makes sense, with teeth like those. You believe that man is one of them, that he bit Tesla?” The thought makes Sosuke vaguely ill.  _ If we had come any later— _

Szayel cuts off his macabre thoughts. “I had a theory about ghouls that would be proven by this encounter. I don’t think we taste very good to them. When she killed our parents, she killed them, but she didn’t  _ eat _ them. It would be a waste, wouldn’t it? Two bodies.”

The manner in which Szayel can speak of such a traumatizing event as if it was only a minor inconvenience in his life is both disturbing and impressive. “I suppose that makes sense.”

“Based on the way that we’ve always hunted, the idea of just leaving a kill to rot instead of devouring it just… It doesn’t make sense. And she didn’t  _ bite _ them to kill them.” Szayel returns the envelope to its drawer and Sosuke wonders if Yylfordt had taken the photo right before stepping between the woman and Szayel and laying her to waste. “At any rate: Tesla was bitten, but he wasn’t missing any flesh. Just wounded.”

“I’m sure that wasn’t a traumatizing experience.” Sosuke shakes his head, setting the report back on the desk. He doesn’t know what he was expecting in the first place.

Szayel shrugs a shoulder at him, neatening up his stacks once more. “Why did you ask in the first place? That was a while ago. Tesla’s all fine now. I haven’t been able to find any continuous issues with him. He seems to be in perfect health.”

“That creature has been skulking through our territory and the territories belonging to the Zaraki and Kuchiki packs,” Sosuke explains, pushing himself off of the edge of the desk. “I need to know what we are facing. Humans are simple. Anything else is not.”

“If it’s any consolation, a ghoul dies just like any other creature. Yylfordt could give you more details on that than I can, though.” Szayel’s voice shows the slightest hint of weakness there and Sosuke nods, deciding to let the topic drop for the time being.

It was for the best if he did not push any of his pack any harder than necessary.

“What about the results of the test you performed on me?” Sosuke asks, and Szayel blinks up at him, golden eyes glinting beneath the frames of his glasses.

He shuffles aside several reports and picks up a new one, holding it out. “I don’t think you need to read it to know the answer. You knew when you came to ask me in the first place.”

“So it’s true, then.” Sosuke takes the report, unsurprised at the results. “Do you know why my body is reacting this way, other than that it is? Is there something damaged about it?”

“I couldn’t find anything wrong from the tests I performed but you were not wrong in your guess. For whatever reason, you go into heat, but it’s not a true heat. Um, hold on, I did some tests on some others to show you.” Szayel disappears into his drawers again, comes back with a fat stack of papers and sits them down, flipping through more reports to show Sosuke the numbers he has highlighted. “See? These hormones increase dramatically during heat, but yours don’t. I monitored Ulquiorra during his last heat—”

Sosuke frowns at him. “I hope you didn’t tell him why you were collecting this data.”

Pale rose eyebrows wing up at him, Szayel’s unimpressed gaze arrowing through him. “Do I seem like someone who would do that? No, I told him I was collecting base data. I’ve been doing it for a few omegas, actually. Mila Rose and Nnoitra, as well. The number is never the same of course and there are other factors involved but the increase is always present.”

“And it isn’t present in my body because despite going into heat, my body is never quite fertile.” Sosuke sighs and sets the report back on the desk, not keen on looking at the black and white proof that he’s never going to be able to conceive.

In the back of his mind, he has always suspected this. The longterm damage of taking heat suppressants was very real, and that was without using scent blockers and mock scent at the same time. Living life as anything other than what he was had taken a toll on his body, though he wonders why he would cycle into heat at all if his body isn’t simply responding to the time of the season when his body was prepared for a litter.

“I’d like to do a sonogram to see if I can find anything physically wrong with your reproductive organs, and if I can’t… Then I don’t know.” Szayel throws his hands up in the air, looking lost. “You aren’t infertile. Infertile omegas don’t experience heat at all. Or, well, perhaps it’s false heat? But your hormonal levels should be much lower.”

“Do they look anything similar to an omega’s?” Sosuke asks. He keeps his voice calm and relaxed, not wanting to tip Szayel off to the thoughts traveling through his mind.

_ “You and your siblings were my miracle, you know. Your father and I, we tried so much, but it never… It never worked.”  _ His mother’s hands warm and rough on his cheeks, dry and cracked from working and hunting desperately for them, her eyes boring into his own, wide and blue and clear as the sky overhead.  _ “Don’t you ever think you’re anything less than my treasure, Sosuke. You are the most important thing that has ever happened to me.” _

Not important enough for his father to stay, not after all of his siblings died.

“Alpha?” Szayel taps him gently on the hand. “Are you listening to me?”

Sosuke shakes his head. “Sorry, I wasn’t. My mind wandered. What were you saying?”

“You must have a lot to think about. Even I can understand that.” Szayel’s smile is gentle. “I can keep drawing blood up until your next heat to make sure the numbers continue as I believe. If that’s so, it’s very much in line with Starrk. Like a beta’s fertility.”

That is marginally less distressing than being infertile, Sosuke thinks. Starrk has a daughter, after all. “We’ll do that, then. Thank you, Szayel. As always, keep this between the two of us. I don’t need the rest of the pack knowing anything about this.”

“Of course. Your privacy is protected. Ah, but if that’s all you need, I’d suggest going. I have Grimmjow coming in about five minutes so I can check on him.” Szayel rolls his eyes, quickly stacking up all of the paperwork on his desk and filing it away.

Sosuke smiles softly. “Ah, the twins? Does he still think that each of his mates has mothered one of them even though it’s incredibly unlikely?”

“Yes! It doesn’t help that I ended up finding out they do have two different placentas, which means they aren’t identical twins.” Szayel stands, shaking his head as he goes about setting up the equipment, throwing complaints over his shoulder as he works. “Which does  _ technically _ lend him undeserved credibility. If it was a single placenta, I could say beyond any reasonable doubt that only one of his mates could be the potential mother.”

“What are you going to lose if he ends up being right?” Sosuke asks.

Szayel’s face blanches slightly and he sighs, squeezing his eyes shut. “I told Grimmjow that  _ I _ would hunt for him myself so his mates could stay in his den with him after the kittens are born.  _ Kittens. _ I’m starting to sound like him. He’s also certain he’s having kittens.”

“We don’t have any data on that either, do we?” Sosuke asks, and Szayel shakes his head; they only have two cats in their pack, and Ggio isn’t in a position to father cubs.

With experienced and certain hands, Szayel changes the sheet on the mattress where he obviously has planned for Grimmjow to lay. It almost seems like his body is on autopilot, but that would make sense. He’s been in charge of these rooms since they moved in. “There’s no way to know for certain. I’ve studied, but the data is all over the place. Some couples can’t conceive at all. Some have no trouble. Grimmjow conceived at about the regular time I’d imagine an omega with two alphas would.”

“I knew a pair who couldn’t conceive,” Sosuke muses. He remembers Yoruichi and Urahara’s struggles all too well, how they broke and adopted because waiting for children that might never come grew too hard for them. Despite both of them being in perfect health, nothing had ever happened. “The only difference is that the alpha was a cat, not the omega.”

Szayel cocks his head. “You know, maybe that has something to do with it? Like maybe the omega being a werecat is important and the alpha being a werecat is detrimental… Food for thought. Ggio is just a beta though so I doubt I’ll ever get an answer to that question.”

Before Sosuke can formulate a response, he picks up the familiar scent of Grimmjow and the just as familiar scent of his pregnancy, a flowery note beneath his own. He steps into the doorway and then does a double take when his eyes land on the desk where he likely expects Szayel to be waiting for him, finding his own pack alpha instead. Though Grimmjow had been an unlikely addition to this pack, a loner Sosuke scoped out on his own and went out on a whim to convince to join his ranks, Grimmjow has been indispensable. Even if he prefers not to hunt, he loves to fight, and he never backs down from a challenge.

The only thing that has kept him sidelined recently has been the pregnancy.

“How are you holding up, Grimmjow?” Sosuke looks him up and down, taking in his rumpled clothing and his tousled hair. “Where are your mates? Have they gone out to hunt?”

Grimmjow nods, smothering a yawn against his palm as he shuffles over to the bed. “Yeah. Hal said they’d be back soon. I don’t think they wanna go but it’s important for the pack.”

“If you want, I can look at how they structure the hunts so that one of your mates is always here with you.” The offer has Grimmjow pausing, the corner of his lips twitching, and Sosuke cocks his head. “What? You seem like you’d rather have one of them here.”

“Nel’s gonna owe me. I  _ told _ her you’d fix it if you knew.” Grimmjow drops down on the edge of the bed Szayel has prepared for him, stretching his arms over his head. “This isn’t gonna take long, is it? ‘Cause I wanna go back to bed. I was up all night last night.”

“Sick?” Szayel asks him, guiding him to lie back on the bed as he turns the screen on.

Without missing a beat, Grimmjow shakes his head. “Nope. Just ‘cause I’m knocked up doesn’t mean my ladies don’t end up getting frisky and taking me apart anyway.”

“Christ. I did not need to hear that.” Szayel scowls at him, yanks Grimmjow’s shirt up and slathers his stomach in a gel that must be cold based on the way Grimmjow yelps up at him. “That’s what you get. Every single time you tell me about your sexual escapades when I did not ask, I’m going to make sure it’s colder. I’ll start storing it in the refrigerator.”

Grimmjow pouts up at him, pillowing his head on a folded arm. “You’re an  _ asshole. _ Well, why don’t you tell us about your sexual escapades? If you’re marked, does that make you the—”

“As soon as your children are born, I’m going to poison you so that you die slowly so you understand what the suffering I put up with is like.” Szayel rolls his eyes, and Sosuke notes he did not answer the question. “Alpha, would you like to come see?”

“Yeah.” Grimmjow picks his head up a little. “You wanna come see the kittens?”

Szayel rounds on him. “What did I tell you about assuming they were going to be—”

“Of course.” Sosuke pushes himself off of the desk and comes over so he can see the screen, perching himself on the edge of the mattress but not in Szayel’s way, mindful of how much space he takes up. “They’re going to be part of my pack in the future, after all.”

He watches as Szayel picks up the transducer and places it on Grimmjow’s abdomen, showing the signs of the life inside of him. He’d fallen pregnant during the autumn and spent most of the winter sick and tired and sleeping between his mates, feeding on their body warmth and depending on them to watch over him and take care of him. Now, he looks visibly pregnant, his stomach swollen and rounding. As Sosuke watches, the image on the screen finally gives away to something that looks almost like two infants.

“There they are,” Szayel says, and Grimmjow purrs softly as he smiles. “Okay, let me do my normal examination. My, they’re growing well. You’ve been eating enough, haven’t you?”

“Are you fucking kidding me? Halibel’s watching over my diet like a hawk.” Grimmjow rolls his eyes as if that should have been expected. Sosuke supposes that it should have.

The sound of small footsteps hurrying down the hallway has him turning to see a familiar small face peeking around the edge of the doorway, pale pink eyes watching them curiously before Lilynette steps into clear view. Though she had been on his mind quite a lot lately— Sosuke  _ does _ want his own cubs at some point— the sight of her now is like a reassurance that if Starrk could conceive a child, then perhaps Sosuke can, too.

“Hi,” she says, waving at them with one small hand. “Am I allowed to come in, Szayel-san?”

“Hmm?” Szayel tilts his head to look at her, then nods once. “Of course, Lily. Did you come to see the babies? Grimmjow is just here so I can check on them.”

“The kittens,” Grimmjow corrects him, and Szayel shoots him a smoldering glare for it.

Lilynette nods and bounces into the room, all restless energy at her age; the spring has been good for her, letting her out and about, running through the forest with her father never far from her side to ensure she is safe. It is an unspoken rule in the pack that if Lilynette is nearby, everyone needs to do their best to keep an eye on her. She had just turned five, and it shows in how she thinks she can do everything now.

She pauses at Sosuke’s leg, then holds her arms up to him. “Can you pick me up?”

“Yes, darling.” Without hesitation, Sosuke scoops her up, pressing his nose into her soft hair as he settles her on his lap so she can see the screen as well.

“Tousan says that a lot of pack alphas aren’t very nice, so we’re lucky to be with you,” Lilynette tells him firmly, and Sosuke smiles softly at her words as he rests his chin on the top of her head. “How do you know they’re going to be kittens, Grimmjow?”

Grimmjow winks at her. “Father’s intuition. They’re inside of me, after all.”

“I can hear them swimming.” Lilynette taps her ear knowingly and Sosuke chuckles softly; her enhanced hearing no doubt. Alphas tend to have enhanced hearing while betas have enhanced noses, at least it seems so as far as science has been able to tell.

_ What’s special about being an omega then? If we can’t hear as good or smell as good? _

_ What makes us special is that there is no such thing as a threat to great for us to take on. No one could ever come between an omega and someone they love with all their heart. _

Not that Sosuke had been able to do anything when it came down to protecting his mother.

“They’re small,” Lilynette says, her nose scrunching up as she turns to look up at him. “Is that normal, Aizen-sama? I know babies are small but they look too small.”

“It takes them a very long time to get big enough,” Sosuke tells her, and she looks satisfied enough with that answer as she looks as the screen once more. “When they’re born, they’ll still be small, but they’ll be bigger than they are right now. You used to be that small once, you know, before your father had you.”

“I was never that small,” Lilynette says confidently. “I’ve always been big and strong.”

“Tough little thing,” Grimmjow praises her, and Lilynette beams at him. “Are you gonna watch after my kittens? They’re gonna be little and need protecting as they get older especially if I can’t always keep an eye on ‘em. You wanna play big sister?”

Lilynette’s smile is broad and she nods, all but bouncing in Sosuke’s lap. “Yes! I love kittens. I’ll take good care of them and protect them from all the porcupines.”

“Porcupines,” Szayel says, sounding slightly mortified at the imagery that presents.

Sosuke smiles briefly at the memory. “Starrk told me about that. She fought a porcupine. She doesn’t remember it, but she won. Impressive for such a young pup.”

“God, I wouldn’t even fight a porcupine now. I mean, I guess it’s not much different than fighting with Nnoitra. He’s just as nasty.” Grimmjow smirks when Lilynette giggles. “Alpha, you just hanging out with the good doc today or just taking a break from your duties?”

“I try to check in on Szayel somewhat regularly to make sure he hasn’t been working himself too strenuously.” It’s an easy lie, and part of it is steeped in truth. “Yourself?”

“Been in bed most of the day and plan on going back as soon as I’m done here. Need to catch up on all that sleep I missed when I had morning sickness around the clock.” Grimmjow strokes the side of his stomach and Sosuke imagines he must think it was well worth it since he’ll get two beautiful babies out of the deal.

More footsteps and another familiar scent, this one oceanic in quality; Aaroniero lets himself in as if these medical rooms are his den now as well, stopping only after he’s crossed the threshold. “We’re having a party and no one invited me?”

“I forgot to tell you I had patients,” Szayel says without taking his eyes from the screen.

Aaroniero lopes up easily to his side, catching Szayel around the waist and pressing a kiss to the mark half-hidden by his shirt collar. It’s an announcement as much as anything else; Sosuke sees the moment when Grimmjow’s eyes widen, his mouth falling open on a small shocked noise, but Szayel only smiles and leans back easily into the touch. It’s such an odd sight, watching him lean into affection so openly, so sweetly, so completely.

When this pack came together, the two had a volatile bond to say the least, fighting as much as they laid close to one another. Always at each other’s throats or the best of friends, there never seemed to be an in-between for them. If Sosuke had to guess, he imagines Szayel must have been struggling with his very real attraction to another alpha.

The world was not kind to alphas who loved other alphas. Omegas and omegas, that was… Certainly not frowned upon quite as heavily, but it was fetishized often.

Given how crowded the room is becoming, Sosuke sets Lilynette down on the bed and excuses himself so he can return to his duties checking on the pack that are still within the den itself. Most of them are outside but those who remain in, he tries to keep an eye on until he joins everyone else outside. He knows Tousen went with Yammy’s hunting party, that he always impresses them in being able to find prey that none of the rest of them can quite pick up on. It makes him look all the more impressive in their eyes.

Briefly, Sosuke touches his throat, hesitating as he leans his shoulder against the wall. Will Tousen want to mark him properly if Sosuke could never give him a proper litter?

_ Ridiculous,  _ he tells himself, sighing as he beats back the internal voices that always seek to tear him down at the foundation of his being.  _ He does not care if you give him pups or not. You have never even discussed the matter, not with him. And with Gin, almost all things are possible. Just because your siblings did not survive does not mean there is something in your DNA that will make it impossible to birth healthy pups. _

He wants to give them pups just the same. He wants to see Gin’s silver hair reflected in a child of their own making. He wants to look into his mother’s blue eyes once more.

Pretty fantasies for the time being. But Szayel had found an abnormality, not infertility. If Starrk could successfully give birth to a beautiful daughter, then Sosuke can likely do the same. He just needs to stop worrying over it so much or painting himself into a corner as to what his options are. There is Gin. There will always be Gin to back him up.

_ I can give ya whatever pups ya want, Sosuke. Ya think it’s an accident my kind are still around even though there’s been so many attempts to slaughter us? _ Gin’s breath warm on the side of his neck, fingers teasing between his spread thighs.  _ I don’t need an alpha’s knot to give you every damn thing ya want. All ya gotta do is say the word. _

That memory comes with the unfortunate side effect of making him horny; it had been the first heat he allowed himself to experience while still a member of the Kuchiki pack, his home firmly scent-locked by Gin so that no one else would know the truth. No one could. It had been Sosuke’s best-kept secret for more years than anyone could imagine.

_ But why? _ Gin’s perplexed expression in a much younger face, his slender fingers wrapped around the bottles of medication. The heat suppressants. The scent blocks.  _ Why, Sosuke? _

“Because this world has never been kind to omegas and a single pack will not change that,” Sosuke reminds himself. “Now, where did Gin slip off to? I hope he’s not too busy.”

**Author's Note:**

> i promised you guys that i'd get around to giving these three an origin story and here it is! unfortunately i have no idea how long it's going to be and the timeline will be screwy as you see flashes of the past and the present day. takes place both before, during, and after _it's simply that i have always loved you_. this covers why aizen made the choice he did and how hard it can be to make the right choice when all of your choices come with a risk.


End file.
